This is the ninth month of the year. Today, I met with my 17th suicide client for the year. Most of these have been young people (Male) who feel unwanted, abandoned, unworthy, or/and that the world would be better off without them. But this is simply not true. You are here because your life has purpose. What purpose? I don’t know and neither do you have to know. Most of us go through live not “owning” a purpose but I am willing to bet that you bring a smile to the face/heart of at least one person or animal. Your job here is to really be ALIVE.
How do you cope after you’ve attempted to die? What do you do if after the hospital and the mental health visits you still have no desire to live?
Here are the five things I find most helpful for clients and their families.
- It may seem obvious but TALK about it. Not to dwell on it, but rather to acknowledge that you were in a dark place. Family, offer support and love – Not judgment. Have someone in your back pocket that you can talk to. It may be a friend or the suicide hotline etc. but have someone.
- Create a safety plan. Be aware of your triggers. Work with your doctor or therapist to create a plan of action to reduce the personal risk of suicide. Together examine the triggering people, emotions, thoughts. What will your strategy be to work with each? Decide together when/how to seek treatment. Have any emergency contact for times when you feel yourself spiraling. Write down your safety plan. Take it out of your head put it on paper, your phone or computer.
- Journal. Keep track of your thoughts. When you see them becoming overly negative, make a conscious effort to raise your vibration with positive books, friends, affirmations, music, going out into nature, doing the things that remind you of the pleasure of being alive.
- Find a creative outlet. Do you enjoy singing or dancing, running or sports, painting or writing? Move your body. Move your mind. Find something physical to do that releases energy and brings you joy and satisfaction. You don’t have to be good at it. This is not about what other people think of your actions. This is about releasing our bodies of the heavy toxins and negative emotions and building up the dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins or happy hormones.
- Be Alive!
So many people on this earth are not happy. They are considered to be alive only because they are breathing. What about you? Can you learn to truly LIVE so that joy emanates from your eyes, your voice your entire being? Can you begin to look at another and see the beauty in them? Can you instead of being so hard and negative on yourself, begin each day to find just one thing that is good about you?
Maybe it is something as simple as, “I made that person smile today, or I was able to help that child stop crying, to bring him/her comfort.” What so many of us are unaware of, is that it is the little things, the simple things that really count? The small human connections.
So many times those of us who endure the greatest pain – become an asset in the lives of others because we know, we understand, we feel and we don’t want others to go through the same pain we did.
How can you make someone’s life brighter today?
Today may feel like the hardest day of your life. You (or a friend/family member) thought about ending your life. You may be exhausted. You may be angry. You may be embarrassed or ashamed. It is overwhelming. But, always believe that recovery is possible. Keep hope burning while you reach out for help and reach inward for that strength. It can get better.
